Meditations


Longer away than with us

Nicole Jan 31, 2009

Friday was 3 months since you died.  It seems like an eternity.  When I think about the time you were with us, it seems like a blink of an eye.  Time has little logic.  Your not being here makes little sense to me.  Why things happened the way they did makes little sense to me.  Yes, I know the reasons why, but I can't understand why they happened.  Was it all for some reason I have yet to understand, or was it just the randomness of life?  

I remember the first few days after you were born and recall that you seemed so alert, so wise.  I remember, I remember, I remember: That is usually the lead in when I speak about you and your Brother. I know my wishes mean little in this liftime, but I wish I didn't have to utter those words before I speak about you. My wishes came true but they were so fleeting.  

We light a candle every night for you.  I hope it lights your way in whatever way it can.

You are always loved and I am there with you some how, some way. And you are always here with me, in my heart, in this house.




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